theoretically

2009

2010-01-26T16:40:00.005-04:00

I've so far failed to take stock of 2009, and this has been bugging me since the beginning of January. I've done this year-end survey every year for a long time now, and I need to keep it up, for posterity and all those other things blogs are good at, like being embarrassing. Okay:

1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
I sat on a review committee for a conference, adopted mostly-grown cats from a shelter, interned somewhere, drove part of the way from Toronto to PEI, played an online RPG (don't want to talk about it don't want to talk about it), pushed a cart full of our junk down a busy Toronto street a million times (relatedly: moved into a basement apartment).

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Last year, I wrote "I suppose my new resolution will be continuing to get strong and fit again. I walk a ton in Toronto, and it's treating me well." Yeah... moving a bit further away from the subway station--just far enough to make walking a real pain (and enough to make an always-late me even more late)--really put a cramp in my style. I did, however, successfully complete the 100 push-ups/200 sit-ups challenges, and am kind of in the middle of doing them again. I guess my new resolution is the same. Along with: Battle my introvert tendencies a little less half-heartedly, attempt to be friendly and engaging instead of shy and emotionally cold, become a better public speaker.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Shannon! Note: her baby looks better in sunglasses than anyone I have ever met.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My favourite professor, the woman who made me feel comfortable and welcome in my program despite my initial misgivings. She had a lot of confidence in me and my work, and encouraged me to foster my academic interests in this new framework instead of starting from scratch.

5. What countries did you visit?
I barely leave the house, guys.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Motivation, less procrastination, confidence.... uh, a job. Yeah, a job.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 10th, we picked up Sam and Hailey from the Shelter! Also, June 22nd, the day the City of Toronto strike started and my internship got cut short (and the streets slowly filled with garbage).

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting mostly As in my courses, getting my scholarship renewed.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Still not feeling comfortable speaking in public, not communicating in class enough, not continuing to walk a ton every day, not eating as healthily as I should be. Bummer city.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
For the first week of my internship, I was incredibly ill. Horrific timing; I could barely understand anything going on around me. They taught me how to drive the manually operated freight elevator during all this.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Oh man, my new glasses. My eyes finally forgive me for all the hell I've put them through for the past 11 or 12 years. I wear contacts about twice a week now. Also, ipod touch, honestly--winner of the Device That Makes Me Feel Like I'm in a Sci Fi Movie Award.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Daniel, as always, for being patient and suffering through working an incredibly shitty job while we live in Toronto.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
For those of you that follow the WM3 case, Judge David Burnett. :/ That's my simple answer. In reality, it could probably go on for pages because I'm a Negative Nancy.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, food, wine, vet bills, electronic devices.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Not much. School is a drag. Oh, seeing The Get Up Kids with my brother, Daniel, Kelly, and Taylor! Dream come true. I still knew all the words.

16. What songs will always remind you of 2009?
Nothing really stands out. I haven't been listening to anything different or new. Maybe all of Slanted and Enchanted by Pavement. Maybe.

Oh, maybe "Sincerely, Liza (Bucket Song)" by Richard Laviolette!

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Probably the same, if not more stressed about school.
b) thinner or fatter? Pretty much exactly the same.
c) richer or poorer? Poorer, by one more student loan.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Walking/running, taking the time to talk to classmates, reading for pleasure, making things, sewing my clothes, taking advantage of living in this city.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being anxious, procrastinating, eating junky food.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent it gorging on ridiculous hors d'oeuvres in my apartment with my family (who drove here from PEI). We also went out for Christmas brunch buffet at a place that had six different kinds of fish and a chocolate fountain.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
With some CATS.

22. How many one-night stands?
-100

23. What was your favourite TV program?
We spent the entirety of 2009 going through every Star Trek series (still working on it). Yes, it is true. That is one time consuming endeavour, let me tell you.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don't think so.

25.What was the best book you read?
My reading list was pretty thin this year. I really dove into Bret Easton Ellis, though. I think I enjoyed American Psycho and Glamorama way, way too much (enough to make me miss subway stops)--it makes me feel kind of haunted inside. Yikes. I have a huge compulsion to read more, and I feel like I could very easily consume everything he's ever written, but I would be a broken shell of a person afterward (for the record, I know that not all Ellis's stuff is along the same vein as AP).

I also liked Jose Saramago's Seeing, the Zadie Smith edited anthology The Book of Other People, and Jeanette Winterson's The Stone Gods.

Least favourite? In a SHOCKING DISCOVERY, Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land. What a creepy bastard.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Nothin'.

27. What did you want and get?
Cats, tuition paid for again, an apartment that isn't scary, less house centipedes.

28. What did you want and not get?
The ability to do things on time. :/

29. What was your favourite film of this year?
Synecdoche, New York, Wendy and Lucy

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I can't even remember. I know that I was working on a huge assignment that was due the next day, though. Having a birthday at the end of term SUCKS HARD. Also, I turned 26.

31.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not having to unexpectedly move in August. Expensive, time consuming, and stressful. We did, however, score pretty hard on a nice cheap find.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Awful. A hint of Grad Student With No Time To Shower Wearing Whatever Clothes Were On The Floor.

33. What kept you sane?
Daniel, weekends, and coffee.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't have time, man. I don't have time.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I can't keep track of my political outrages anymore.

36. Who did you miss?
I don't know, people on PEI sometimes. Other times I breathe a sigh of relief that I'm away from crazy shit.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
I don't even think I've met anyone new this year, besides in networking situations.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009?
Breathing really deeply helps.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
God, what a mess, on the ladder of success
Where you take one step and miss the whole first rung

Not really, that song's just in my head on repeat most of the time.

People vs. THE ELITES

2010-01-26T12:13:00.004-04:00

Hey, what's up? Oh, not much over here. Just drinking a coffee and typing out four pages of incoherent shit I wrote down in a notepad at 2am under the guise of "writing a paper." Same old, you know? Assignment after assignment after awkward group presentation. In this one, I'm supposed to critique an article written by my professor*--wild, right? You know those professors. Zany and unpredictable, sometimes vaguely right-wing populists, but what can you do? Write a scathing four pages about their work and hope you don't fail the rest of the course, I guess. Sigh.

Well I gotta run, I'm scheduled to intimidate the masses by perpetuating elitism with too much theory-writing at noon. Can't wait!! Wish you could be here!!

<3, g.

PS - Similarly, I have an appointment next week to intimidate the masses by perpetuating elitism by liking bands "nobody" has heard of! Those poor masses, they won't even know what hit them. Imagine if they found out I just make up band names to make them feel bad! You should come, it'll be a blast. Call me.

[*Stepping outside of this post for a sec, is that even... ethical? This is not the first time it's come up; I've had to write a review of a play directed by my prof for marks before. But writing a critical analysis of their own work for marks? Seems even shadier, to me.]

An update

2009-12-08T13:54:00.005-04:00

Guys, I'm still here. It's true. Except now instead of spending my time on the internet crying about how hard it is to write 10 pages about changing notions of culture and tradition, I'm flailing around in a stack of articles about the galvanic scale, grades of plywood, and relative humidity levels. Suffering in silence is the new blogging for no reason, I guess.

(I'm also writing a "major research paper" for the entirety of this school year. It's not a thesis because there's no committee and no defense, but it's still large and scary. This is my crappy abstract:

Museums are increasingly making use of emerging technologies to digitize their tangible and intangible cultural holdings, but many of their collections include material that is considered sacred by indigenous source communities. Problems arise when digitization projects encounter such material and the restrictions that often accompany it. A common solution to this problem is to simply omit the materials from the database, but some projects, particularly in Australia, are attempting to find solutions that are a compromise between safeguarding sensitive information and giving back knowledge to source communities. This is a relatively new practice (as of the first decade of the 21st century) that merits further investigation and critical examination, and this paper intends to do so using Australia as a framework. Models of knowledge databases used by Australian cultural institutions and the communities they serve will be examined by tracing their history and considering how they attempt to negotiate with culturally sensitive materials and the politicized issues that accompany them. Notable projects of the past and present included in the discussion are the Kimberley Website Project of the Berndt Museum, the database of the Australian Institute of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Studies website, and the Ara Irititja database project. Assessing their successes and failures can provide insight for future projects, or aid in creating much-needed guidelines and standards for working with sensitive indigenous knowledge.

So there you have it. All of my writing is being sucked away into this abyss that I'm probably not even going to present at any conferences.

I've been thinking about changing what this site does for me sometime--maybe when I graduate this spring. As of now, I'm not really using it and there's a frightening amount of horrific information about me festering here. Don't unsubscribe to my RSS feed just yet--we'll see.

MUSEUM TALK AHEAD

2009-06-12T15:26:00.006-03:00

Dear British Museum,

Why y'gotta be such haters*?

I shouldn't come out swinging, all crazy like that, with what appears to be an uncritical and knee-jerk opinion to yet another piece to this long-running drama. It's not, really. TO ME. Let's talk about it.

1. 200ish years ago, Greece is occupied. Our good friend Lord Elgin swoops in and politely asks the Ottoman empire if he could just take a little chisel and collect a few bits of that little ol' thing called the Parthenon for his humble collection. Ottomans reportedly say "No biggie." He grabs a huge chunk of the frieze and about half the statues.

2. Lord Elgin gets back to England and says, "CHECK OUT WHAT I GOT, GUYS!" People cringe. After a bit of hand-wringing, everyone closes their eyes and the British Museum forks over the cash for the stuff. They build an entire new gallery just for the marbles.

3. Lots of time passes, Parthenon marbles become a symbol of the British Museum, people love that shit, etc.

4. Athens is kind of pissed off.

5. British Museum subtly changes its deaccessioning policy, stating that the only reasons anything can ever, ever, ever leave the museum (besides a loan) are because a) the object is a risk to the rest of the collection, or b) the object is too damaged to be of any worth. I think that's it. When Athens gets ready for another round of "HEY THAT'S MY STUFF" the museums says that their hands are tied, IT'S LEGAL POLICY. i.e. nobody can have their shit back, ever. EVER. Too bad for you, everyone that Britain has ever fucked up.

6. What a bunch of dicks.

7. Right, so, one of oft-quoted arguments for leaving the marbles in London is that if they had never been taken from Athens, they would now be ruined by air pollution. How many times have we heard that one before? 'Sup, I am a Trusted Anthropologist, and I'm saving your stuff from yourself because you don't know how to take care of it, and besides, your culture's going to be overtaken by McDonalds and Romantic Marriage in about 45 seconds anyway.

I suppose that during a certain time period, this would have seemed like a justified argument (ignoring the terrible air pollution in Britain in the 19th century), but is that any excuse now? Athens has really cleaned up its air and has made great (by Western standards) efforts to preserve its cultural heritage. The Acropolis Museum is opening on June 20th, actually. It's weak, that's what it is. Really weak.

8. And yes, there's also the idea that the Parthenon Marbles are now a part of British culture just as much as they were in Greece, so who is Greece to say that they deserve them more, etc? This jives with me more than other arguments, but I'm just not sure it flies. Clearly the Parthenon marbles are an interesting symbol of a subset of "Greek identity"--traditional "Greek identity" I guess--moreso than British identity, unless you want to say it represents a whole lot of jerkwad moves on the part of the friendly historical Great Britain.

Although, you know, I do appreciate the idea. That cultural groups are not so clearly defined, etc. Yeah, you've heard it from me before.

9. Q: But, if they are given back to Greece, they will be depriving people of the world of a chance to view, study, and appreciate them! If the museum gives in, then what's stopping other museums from repatriating lots of important historical objects to groups that want them! WHAT ABOUT THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE WORLD?!

A: Get bent. I hate that Enlightenment garbage, especially the brand of Englightenment garbage that the British Museum (and others) buy into. Let's ignore the power and politics of every situation and distribute Truth for the greater good. Cool. I'M IN.

I think I'm just pretty pissy about repatriation issues, no matter who the countries/groups involved are. And, if there's an organisation I hate based on their institutional attitude (based on a reading of their policies), it's the British Museum. Come on, guys.

(Regarding that story I linked to, the British Museum gallantly offered to loan the Parthenon Marbles to the soon-to-open Acropolis Museum for three months. The condition of the loan was that Greece had to acknowledge the museum as the legal owners of the sculptures. Because really, how could they loan something to someone who did not recognise their title? Man. They basically dangled a carrot in front of Greece's nose and hoped they were desperate enough to grab it without considering the consequences. That's sly.

*Imperial, colonial assholes?

I mean, not that Greece is without its faults. But I'll take any opportunity to hate on the B.M.

I'm just full of it today.

LABOUR ACTION

2009-06-09T11:29:00.002-03:00

It seems that City employees may strike on June 22nd, leaving me out of... an internship? I will totally cross a picket line to work for free if it means getting an A and/or not failing.

WORKIN' IT

2009-06-02T13:36:00.002-03:00

Wish list:

- Heavy bag.
- Chin-up bar.
- Various free weights (probably 5, 10, 15, 20+)
- A few good resistance bands.
- Angled bench with foot holds.
- Elliptical machine or exercise bike (for my 85-year old knees).
- Big full length mirror.
- A small TV/DVD player so I can listen to movie/TV show
commentaries--this is important.

And probably a room to put all my crap in, I guess. For now, I will slowly (very, very slowly) pick away at this unrealistic list and subsquently start making our living space look completely insane.

I don't entirely take issue with this (although others might...); I'd rather trip over weird exercise equipment than spend many more years participating the weird ritual that is Going To The Gym. I used to find it oddly comforting. The changing room was actually my favourite space, wherein I grabbed a secluded corner, zoned out, and let my brain quietly hum along while I changed and prepared on autopilot.

Now I just lose patience when I think about finding a new place, and getting comfortable with their unwritten rules and codes. I'm also a lot less comfortable working out with other people now. I think this is directly related to a sort of new-found propensity for talking to myself loudly while in the throes of a work out.

Man, is this all I can really bring myself to write about now? What is that? I'm like that guy at the bar who leers over at you and slurs about how much he can bench-press.

G., Misguided Jock Who Drinks Too Much Since 2001.

WORK DAY

2009-05-27T15:43:00.001-03:00

In the dark, alone, with the spiders and the armless, eyeless mannequins.

TEST

2009-05-26T10:54:00.002-03:00

I'm trying out this whole Blog From Your Email Account Because Your IT Department Has Everything Besides Web-Mail and the Corporate Intranet Blocked thing. Does this actually work? I doubt I can even check my own website to find out.

How about some bulleted lists? That's probably an easy way to not suck right now.

Things I am starting to love (or at least feel strongly fond of):

Toronto, and Toronto neighbourhood names.
The sad and contemplative commuters on the bus I take every morning.
Short-sleeved cardigan sweaters. I feel like this is some sort of slippery slope to sweater vests, and I'm hurtling toward them on an out of control crazy-carpet (Krazy Karpet?!). Watch out, sleeves. You're pretty much done for.
Learning about databases.
Scarborough (The bluffs, guys. The bluffs.)
Million year old elevators that I make move by pulling a rope with my hands. Relatedly: saying "Drive the elevator."
Kick boxing

Things I still hate:

House centipedes.
Inexplicably loud neighbour-noises (this includes: possibly falling out of bed, drum machines, computer start-up chimes, MSN message alerts, wanky guitar playing, talking to moms on the phone).
The 512 St. Clair West bus/fake streetcar. Related: construction projects that take 8000 years to complete and that make drivers even more harried and short-tempered than usual.
Pants. (It's true; I often hate wearing pants, but in this case I mean a] all the pants that are for sale in every store in the history of life, and b] trying on said pants and fuming quietly into a changing-room mirror while I imagine all the ways in which I could make better pants. SIDE-NOTE: Someone please mail me a sewing machine, please and thanks.)

The Hate list is shorter than the Love list. A shocking development.

Things I definitely love, without question:

Getting a GPA of 3.9 (4 A's and 2 A-'s) this year and subsequently getting another year of school completely paid for by the university.

Z) NONE OF THE ABOVE

2009-04-13T23:59:00.003-03:00

I can't believe I have an exam tomorrow. What is this? Multiple choice questions? Short answer? Open... book? Take the test... online? .....from home? Okay. Will do, technology. In fact, I'm not even going to get dressed. I'll stay in my pajamas until 1:30pm, just so I can be an idiot and say to my cats, "Hey guys, I'm doing an exam in my pajamas and slippers." Then, I will nonchalantly take a sip of my coffee, confidently press the start button, and... probably throw all my articles to the floor and roll around in them, crying.

I will continue to lie on the floor while considering the question, "Using the procedural manual SPECTRUM and relevant literature from the field, please relate the intellectual task of being alive with the practical challenges, functionalities, standards, guidelines, information fields, and problematisations of the role documentation plays in a fictional exhibit scenario of your choosing. Please substantiate your views with specifics.

And go screw yourselves."

To people with post-secondary school experience: Have you ever had a class that you just dread attending, where almost no one knows exactly what's going on, but the professor insists on being confrontational and takes great joy in randomly calling on people (usually to discuss the merits/shortfalls of their last assignment, and how it relates to the topic at hand)? How progressive and interactive! How... terrifying. Panic-attack-inducing. God, calling on people? Really? I think I even hate that more than presentations.

It wouldn't have been so bad if the material hadn't been presented in such a convoluted, nonsensical way, and, you know, I actually had answers to provide. Every Tuesday I'd walk into the classroom with sweaty palms and a little lump of fear in my stomach. I felt like I was in junior high, except in junior high I didn't have to maintain a 3.7 GPA to keep my scholarship. Christ. Worst grad school experience ever, so far. Worst university experience in general, really.

I'm really just complaining to avoid studying. I'm going to eat some crackers and skim a 400 page PDF doc. Bye internet, my PJs and I will see you later.

TOWARDS A THEORY OF PROCRASTINATION

2009-04-09T12:59:00.004-03:00

Procrastination, I think, is an important tool of self-discovery. It allows me explore many tangential interests and topics that I otherwise wouldn't permit myself to indulge in for longer than a few minutes. In fact, I would even submit that it encourages me to create new interests--interests that could potentially take up hours and hours of time that would otherwise just be spent delving deeper into areas with which I'm already familiar.

Examples of interests developed in periods of procrastination:

- A line of hair care products from Australia with vaguely industrial-themed packaging.

- Spill-proof travel mugs.

- Making frothed milk with a whisk and a microwave.

- Jeans with a spandex content higher than 3%.

- Flash puzzler games that take 20+ minutes to complete.

- Okay, look. I've just been sitting on the internet doing absolutely nothing. I haven't even showered or eaten anything.

There are currently 13 piles of articles sitting on my dining room table (each representing a different intellectual or practical theme of collections management), an exam on Tuesday, and a prof who does not share my academic predilection for the post-modern (for the lack of a better word in this context).

I am on pile #2. And have been since last night. I need someone to stand behind me and tell me to stop thinking about stretchy pants and start reading about the cultural biography of objects, stat.

REBORN

2009-03-27T19:35:00.003-03:00

Haircuts are a scary and life-changing thing for me, okay? I need to get this out.

A few hours ago:

Shrouded in eight million pounds of hair.

Currently:

AAAAGH. OH HEY, MY FACE! HOW'VE YOU BEEN?

- Hiding behind your gross mop, you lazy cheapskate.

I'm okay with it, but even the best cut in the world wouldn't stop me from mourning my long, long hair. Bye, thanks for letting me use you as a scarf all winter. It's been swell.

HELP

2009-03-24T18:35:00.004-03:00

Toronto, can you tell me where I should get my hair cut this upcoming Thursday, Friday, or Saturday?* A few things:

- I need to get something bad-ass. My current hair is the opposite of bad-ass. It's long and normal and obviously poorly tended to.
- I usually only get my hair cut approximately once every two years, because I'm terrified stylists won't understand my personal style and will attempt to make me look like some sort of NORMIE**. Also, ever since I was a little girl I've been incredibly attached to having really, really long hair, and every time I get it chopped I feel like I've been mutilated. Yikes.
- Since this is a bi-annual expenditure, I'm not scared to spend a lot of money on someone who will do something fun, professional, and ultimately... bad-ass.

Going on 2.5 years since my last shortish cut, and a year since my last trim. HELP ME. PLEASE.

* It's my birthday on Sunday, and I'd like to look spiffy for my non-existent Toronto friends.
** NORMIE: Maybe like someone who has Nickelback in their Facebook list of favourite music, and wears Uggs with leggings. I'm judgin'.

HAPPY SPRING DAY

2009-03-20T14:25:00.003-03:00

Oh, Spring. The ground is thawing, the sunlight is warm and yellow, small green things are growing, the cats are scratching at the windows, and I immediately start sneezing my face off. Welcome, Spring. I'm glad you and my allergies can be together once again. Party down, I guess.

Things I can't wait for:
- Walking around in tank tops comfortably.
- TENNIS.
- When the other tenants in this building realise that they don't need the heat cranked up to 35 degrees anymore.
- More cats wandering around the neighbourhood for me to talk to on my walk to school/work.

Things that can get lost:
- Sneezing.
- Bugs up in my business.
- Sweltering heat of the city.
- SNEEZING.

PROFESSOR SAM

2009-03-13T12:59:00.005-03:00

Oh wait, this is why I can't do school:

I'm trying to write important words about a really, really terrible article that lays the smackdown on First Nations groups trying to protect their secret-sacred religious objects/ideas--by saying they are dangerously undermining the LIBERAL DEMOCRARY. Sam loves liberal democracies and free speech and is trying to sabotage my assignment.

Note: He does this every single time I try to write. On Day One of his residence here he decided that pens are food/toys/at least swallowable.

THE POETICS AND POLITICS OF SUCKING AT SCHOOL

2009-03-12T11:14:00.004-03:00

Hating school this week. Wishing that I could magically finish this program right now and get a meaningful job, where taking my work home and worrying about it late at night during bouts of insomnia wasn't part of the job description.

For the first time ever, I'm struggling to keep my head above water in a course, through what feels like no fault of mine. Assignment requirements have not been clear, the marking seems arbitrary and inconsistent, and it seems no amount of effort will change the outcome. When asked what my favourite anthropology-related book was, I told my prof that I really liked Writing Culture, and I think that totally whacked in the last nail. He laughed at me. Man, archaeologists. I think I'm developing weird stereotypes for different fields, now that I'm in a multi-disciplinary program. Awful.

Academia, I hate you today. At the same time, I think I'm in the wrong field. I don't even care anymore. I just want to have the tools to get a job, so that I can be secure and comfortable enough to explore whatever I'd like. I guess. That's pretty idealistic.

I guess so is thinking that grad school will be easy.

WINE O'CLOCK

2009-03-06T20:06:00.002-04:00

We've been a bit slack with the updates, but three new wines up at GD Wine. They're from last week, and we just bought two more to try tonight. Maybe we'll get super motivated and post them tomorrow after a bookstore adventure downtown. In the meantime, check out how fancy we are with our ice wine.

But you don't have to take MY word for it

2009-03-02T20:57:00.004-04:00

Tonight, this happened:

That, if you couldn't tell from the horrid blurry quality of this photo, is LeVar Burton. Courtesy of: Spontaneous Twitter meet-ups, the heated deck of Hemingway's, and stranger who grabbed our camera to take this photo without even questioning it.

He was incredibly friendly, and here he is singing us a song about our anniversary.

Another, to prove that IS actually LeVar and not some blurry dude in a hat (warning, MEGA FLASH PAIN):

Ow, my face.

God, I love the internet. Only there can you just casually address television stars and advise them of places to get a drink, and then go drink with them. Twitter, you win.

"1 Star: Unbalanced"

2009-02-24T00:13:00.002-04:00

I keep forgetting about this. Sometimes I think I've phased out being an information creator on the internet.

Hahaha, information.

However, it's also 11:30pm on a Monday night and I'm still awake, sitting at my computer writing on the internet about how I don't write on the internet anymore.

Other things I should be doing with my time right now:
- Writing a presentation (critiquing a cultural institution's website)
- Doing my readings so when my grainy teleconference Virtual Prof asks me a question, I will be fully prepared to sit awkwardly in the Microphone Chair.
- Perfecting my Wii Fit ski slalom.*
- Sleeping, because I've been up since 5am.
- Making delicious soups for future eating pleasure.

* SERIOUSLY. Relatedly, I don't open the living room curtains much anymore, for fear that the hip, young, electronic-music-loving university students that live in the front basement will see me virtual hula hooping or ski jumping. Depressing**. In so many ways.

** Definition of Depressing: My complete inability to follow simple aerobics instructions for more than two steps at a time. I got yelled at by a Nintendo game.

LOVE LETTERS

2009-02-08T02:28:00.003-04:00

Dear Downstairs Neighbour,

Okay, I'm kind of drunk right now. I admit. We bought a bunch of wine so we could review it for the internet, and if that doesn't make us geeks I'm not sure what else possibly could. Actually.... our Amazon.ca order this week probably would; I don't really want to talk about it, and you seriously do not want to hear about it. I think the mail carrier is going to egg our house. Anyway,

I think after your two or three months of residence below me, I sort of know your musical tastes. You like Rob Zombie, and NOFX, and you REALLY like Nine Inch Nails and showing off whatever your new synth can do. You've also taken a shine to Johnny Cash recently; this I can deal with, unless you're trying to play bass and sing along to Ring of Fire at the same time (which is ALL THE TIME). Practice without your amp first. Trust me.

TONIGHT, however, you and your friend have decided that singing along to the Grease soundtrack would really get the party started. It did. Except it's fucking 1:30am and you're singing along to the Grease soundtrack. Oh my fucking god. Please stop. It sounds like dying woodland creatures, and I can't deal with that kind of trauma to my psyche.

Love, your Upstairs Neighbour.

PS - Your computer speakers have a volume setting. You don't need to know if you got an MSN message if you're already half a kilometre down the street. Similarly, I do not need to know if you got an MSN message while I'm in my bathroom.

FISHING THE SKY

2009-02-06T13:27:00.007-04:00

One of my dreams is going to come true, only about six or seven years late:

I just bought tickets to see THE APPLESEED CAST at the Horseshoe in April. 19 year old me just passed out on her bedroom floor somewhere back in 2002.

If they play anything from THIS, I will pee myself:

(also, The End of the Ring Wars. Obviously.)

Holy shit. Holy shit. If they play "Forever longing the golden sunsets" I will crumble into dust. Someone will need to sweep me up into a dust pan and protect the pile on the way home to make sure the subway doesn't blow me away.

Time to catch up on the FOUR ALBUMS I missed when I quit listening to them for various reasons.

EDIT: AND "STEPS AND NUMBERS", YES YES YES YES.

IT'S TIME TO LIGHT THE LIGHTS

2009-01-28T14:10:00.004-04:00

I can't imagine that this comparison hasn't been made before, but all of the images coming out of Canadian political news these days are making me feel like the Liberal party is being led by this guy:

Not that I'm insinuating they have similar political ideals, but man. In my fantasies, CBC runs a special report in which we discover that Frank Oz actually controls the entire parliament from a small dimly-lit room underneath the House of Commons.

THE FRUITS OF OUR LABOUR

2009-01-24T01:28:00.002-04:00

By labour I mean drinking on Fridays to celebrate the end of another week of confused learning and photocopying at the library.

Daniel and I started writing down notes about the various wines that we buy; we usually make a point of buying something different every week, and we get easily confused. We decided to more efficiently document our wine adventures by starting a blog. This is probably so we can ctrl+f and find out what wines we've already tried, instead of standing in the liquor store holding the bottle up to my face going, "MAN, THIS LABEL LOOKS REALLY FAMILIAR. DID WE TRY THE WINE WITH THE CAT ON IT YET?"

WINE BLOG

We spent most of our almost six months in Toronto buying solely Ontario wine--since January, we've been spreading our wino wings a little bit, so the blog doesn't really reflect our actual buying habits yet. Just wait--there will be much yelling about our friend JT in the near future.

THE TIME IS SO LITTLE, THE TIME BELONGS TO US

2009-01-17T20:03:00.002-04:00

Listening Minor Threat is probably the best thing I've done all week.

It also makes me fondly remember: Seeing The Evens (aka Possibly The Best Show I Have Ever Gleefully Attended), shaking Ian MacKaye's hand after he said, "Gimme some paw."

in which I say virtually nothing

2009-01-14T12:24:00.003-04:00

- That "new media" class I was talking about is about the internet (with a generous helping of Marshall McLuhan). Last class we discussed how in the 90s, many institutions got really pumped about producing CD-ROMS full of super cool content, like photos that you could click on and enlarge. Everybody chuckled at a reference to Encarta Encyclopedias. Heartwarming.

(I also learned that in the late 1980s, Bill Gates wrote to many museum directors in the US and offered to digitize their collections for them.... in exchange for the rights to the content and images. What a sly fox, that man.)

- Oh yeah, for those who don't have facebook: a no-facebook safe link to CAT PICTURES. This is actually Daniel's album; we have all the same photos, and I decided to take a step in the Not Being a Crazy Lady direction by not making my own duplicate one. I'm so responsible.

- In order to force myself to do something other than my wholly unimaginative weight routine during my time not in class, I'm working on two different six-week programs that will eventually have me doing 100 consecutive push-ups and 200 sit-ups. The sit-ups won't be a problem--I'm mostly doing it for balance and consistency--but holy shit, I am so fucking bad at push-ups. My little baby wrists tremble and cry out at the thought of being abused in such a brutal manner.

I've been doing knee push-ups to build up my strength for the first little while, but it still sucks. My hands are too small for this business. Also, little boy cat thinks chasing my hair while I'm lying on the ground is the best game he's ever played. I won't even make it to week six--I'll probably die of gangrene in my cat-claw punctured neck.

I'm getting stronger in new ways, though. I can tell. So tough.

S&H

2009-01-10T18:23:00.003-04:00

OPERATION: GET SOME CATS was a success.

We now live with a little boy cat (7ish months) and a little girl cat (1 year old, possibly). They were living together in their own communal room at the shelter, so they're already well acquainted, despite not being siblings.

A few moments ago we decided to name them Sam and Hailey, after the two characters in this strange and wonderful book by Mark. Z. Danielewski. I think it's perfect.

Pictures will come--if we can get them to stop MOVING AROUND so much. I have about 25 pictures of cat-shaped blurs.